1. Donkeys are like cats, they fit through pinholes. Close the chicken shed door.
2. Donkeys are like oiled cats and fit through anything. CLOSE THE CHICKEN SHED DOOR.
3. You don’t need an alarm clock. Get a donkey and set a time for feeding. You will never be late for anything ever again.
4. If you plan ahead and plant a nice Christmas tree in the summer, you will be decorating a Christmas stick by December.
5. If it’s edible, it will be eaten.
6. Break-ins are a given.
7. Even if you have 6 round bales of hay in the field, the donkey is starving to death.
8. If you have a horse with a super mane in the field with the donkey – running braid that mane and tuck it out of reach, or you will be roaching that mane. There will be a donkey hanging off it.
9. If it looks like the donkey is killing another donkey or a horse – don’t worry. He’s playing. Donkeys play rough!
10. Donkeys will chase things. Anything. Any intruder, whether harmless (my poor chickens!) or not (hiker dog found out the hard way.) They don’t have a flight instinct like horses, they have a fight instinct. So if the donkey is staring at your dog? Walk that dog away. Pronto.
11. Donkeys like people. Well, mine does. A bit too much maybe, because he nearly pushed me down a cliff once. “Gotta get close to you…”
12. You will lose a battle of wills with a donkey.
13. If you think you’re going for a walk with the donkey, you’ll be going where the donkey wants to go. Which is to the next lump of grass.
14. Sticks are a good thing. Trust me. (And this from a person who doesn’t like sticks.)
15. Backing a donkey away from anything edible is mission impossible.
16. The farrier / dentist / vet will kill the donkey. According to my donkey. Best to lie down.
17. Donkeys are stronger than you. Forget it.
18. They have a brain, they know how to use it, and you will lose. Resign yourself to that fact.
19. Donkey heads fit into hen houses.
20. Rugs will kill a donkey.
Yep, learned all of that. But… he’s cuddly, sweet, and has a super nature. One look and all is forgiven. 
I did so enjoy this writing! Thanks so much for giving me some good laughs today!
You’re welcome. 🙂
He’s… spe-schi-hul… if you know what I mean…
We had a feral donkey at our farm. His job was to protect the cows and apparently wake me up every morning at 4 am. His bray was so loud, he could have been 20 acres away or right next to my bed – okay I’m awake now!
Thanks for the chuckle!
Best alarm clocks, hands down!
My repeat Gite guest commented this morning that “Timmy was quiet, is he ok?” when he didn’t get brayed out of bed at 6am.
“It was dark, and he was eating…” was my reply lol
Very fun story
Thanks… and it’s all true!!